Hook's most elaborate Practical Joke was in 1811 and was called the Berners Street Hoax. It was widely copied afterwards in other cities.
In 1810 the most famous of all nineteenth-century hoaxes was organised by Theodore Hook and two friends, Mrs Nancy Mathews and Henry Higginson. Six weeks were spent in preparation, during which time about four thousand letters were dispatched. All the letters, using different pretences, invited the recipients to call on 27th November at the house of a Mrs Tottenham at number 54 Berners-street
The Morning Post newspaper next day reported what happened.
MOST EXTRAORDINARY SCENE
The greatest hoax that ever has been heard of in this metropolis was yesterday practised in Berners-street. The house of Mrs Tottenham, a Lady of fortune, at No. 54, was beset by about a dozen tradespeople at one time, with their various commodities, and from the confusion altogether such crowds had collected as to render the street impassable.
Waggons laden with coals from the Paddington wharfs, upholsterers' goods in cart loads, organs, pianofortes, linens, jewellery, and every other description of furniture sufficient to have stocked the whole street, were lodged as near as possible to the door of 54, with anxious trades-people and a laughing mob. About this time the Lord Mayor of London arrived in his carriage, and two livery servants, but his Lordship's stay was short, and he was driven to Marlborough-street Police Office. At the Office his Lordship informed the Sitting Magistrate that he had received a note purporting to have come from Mrs. Tottenham, which stated that she had been summoned to appear before him, but that she was confined to her room by sickness, and requested his Lordship's favour to call upon her. Berners-street at this time was in the greatest confusion, by the multiplicity of trades-people, who were returning with their goods, and spectators laughing at them.
The officers belonging to Marlborough-street Office were immediately ordered out to keep order, but it was impossible for a short time. The first scene witnessed by the officers were six stout men bearing an organ, surrounded by coal-merchants with permits, barbers with wigs, mantua-makers with hand-boxes, opticians with their various articles of trade, and such was the pressure of trades-people who had been duped, that at four o'clock all was consternation and confusion. Every Officer that could be mustered was enlisted to disperse the people, and they were placed at the corners of Berners-street, to prevent trades-people from advancing towards the house with goods.
The street was not cleared at a late hour, as servants of every denomination wanting places began to assemble at five o'clock. It turned out that letters had been written to the different trades-people, which stated recommendations from persons of quality. A reward had been offered for the apprehension of the author of the criminal hoax. This hoax exceeded by far that in Bedford-street a few months since ; for besides a coffin, made to measure, agreeable to letter, five feet six, sixteen, there were accoucheurs , tooth-drawers, miniature-painters, artists of every description, auctioneers, undertakers, grocers, mercers, post-chaises, mourning-coaches, poultry, rabbits, pigeons, etc. In fact, the whole street was literally filled with the motley group.
The following are a few of the notes sent in the name of Mrs. Tottenham, for the purpose of collecting this most extraordinary group :-
A tiny undated news-cutting in Theodore's
scrapbook shows he knew that the authorities were on his trail -
It is extremely probable that the Berners-street hoaxer will not long escape detection, Mrs Tottenham having resolved, be the experience what it may, to discover the Wit "by Hook or by Crook."
The Satirist magazine printed the following account in verse on 1st January 1811. Theodore sometimes contributed to the journal but all contributions were printed anonymously, so this may or may not have been written by him -
Epistle from Solomon Sappy, Esquire, in London, to his brother Simon at Liverpool.
Here, John, bring my pen, for my whimsical Muse
Invites me to send brother Simon the news !
These were, my dear brother, the first words I uttered,
Having swallowed my tea and three muffins well buttered,
John did as I bade him, then bowing retired,
(John's as civil a footman as ever was hired.)
And now I'll endeavour to tell you, in rhyme,
A joke which the kiddies call "bang up and prime".
A stiff-starch'd, precise, economical dame,
Who in Berner's-street lives, Mistress Tottenham by name,
Had offended, it seems, some mirth-loving folks,
Who resolved to be amply revenged by a hoax.Invitations and orders were sent in her name,
(In truth I must own, 'twas a scandalous shame)
To milliners, wine-merchants, lawyers, musicians,
Oculists, coal-merchants, barbers, opticians,
Men of fashion, men cooks, surgeons, sweeps, undertakers,
Confectioners, fishmongers, innkeepers, bakers,
Men-midwives - the man who exhibits a bear,
And, O worse than all ! to his lordship the mayor.All were earnestly begged to be at her door
Precisely at two, or a little before,
The surgeons first, armed with catheters, arrive
And impatiently ask is the patient alive.
The man servant stares - now ten midwives appear,
"Pray, sir, does the lady in labor live here ?"
"Here's a shell," cries a man, "for the lady that's dead,
"My master's behind with the coffin of lead."
Next a waggon, with furniture approaches,
Then a hearse all be-plumed and six mourning coaches,
Six baskets of groceries - sugars, teas, figs ;
Ten drays full of beer - twenty boxes of wigs.
Fifty hampers of wine, twenty dozen French rolls,
Fifteen huge waggon loads of best Newcastle coals -
But the best joke of all was to see the fine coach
Of his worship the mayor, all bedizen'd, approach ;
As it pass'd up the street the mob shouted aloud,
His lordship was pleased and most affably bow'd,
Supposing, poor man, he was cheered by the crowd ;
Still he could not imagine the cause of the roar
When his gold-bedeck'd footmen knock'd at the door ;
At length he found out he was duped by a hoax,
And his lordship, it seems, is no friend to such jokes,
For he lustily swore "he'd to punishment bring
The rogues who had thus broke the peace of the king."In sooth 'twas a shame (not withstanding 'twas witty)
To make such a fool of the lord of the city,
And exactly the converse of that civic rule,
Which makes a lord mayor of a fool.
Away drove his lordship, by thousands attended,
The people dispersed, and thus the hoax ended,
Mistress Tottenham, poor lady, tho' frighten'd to fits,
Slept soundly at night and recover'd her wits,
My dear brother adieu, may you live long and happy ;
Your true and affectionate Solomon Sappy.
Writing his auto-biographical novel
Gilbert Gurney twenty years later, Theodore confessed - I am the man - I did
it ; sent a Lord Mayor in state to relieve impressed seamen, philosophers, and
sages, to look at children with two heads apiece - pianofortes by dozens, and
coal-waggons by scores - two thousand five hundred raspberry-tarts from half
a hundred pastry-cooks - a squad of surgeons - a battalion of physicians, and
a legion of apothecaries - lovers to see sweethearts, ladies to find lovers
- upholsterers to furnish houses, and architects to build them - gigs, dog-carts,
and glass-coaches enough to convey half the free-holders of Middlesex to Brentford.
Nay I despatched even royalty itself on an errand to a respectable widow, whose
concourse of visitors, by my special invitation, choked up the great avenues
of London, and found employment for half the police of the metropolis ...
Copy the joke and it ceases to be one - any fool can imitate an example once
set ; but for originality of thought and design, I do think that was perfect.
Afterwards, Theodore's hoax was imitated ad nauseam in many English towns, and in Paris with numberless unmeritorious variations.
| To read about his other amazing hoaxes, buy the book about his life and work which is called "The Man Who Was John Bull" |